A Tightly-Packed Kitty

Starting tomorrow, my friend Steven and a group of his friends will be spending a week up at our place in Ptown. On Monday night, he will be performing in Showgirls as his esteemed yet none-too-classy alter-ego, Miss Connie Cat. (Those of you in the French Quarter may recognize her as the hostess of Good Friend's annual Trailer Park Beauty Pageant.)

But right now he's at the airport heading to Kansas City for a pre-vacation business trip. Just got off the phone with him.

"Girl, I've checked a luggage parfait. Connie on the bottom, me in the middle and work drag on top."

His big fear is something will set off the giant x-ray and TSA will have to open the bag and go through it, strewing wigs and make-up everywhere.

TSA stooge: "Uhm, sir, what's with the bags of grain?"

Connie: "What's the matter, ain't ya never seen boobs before?"