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Open Up My Eager Eyes

And this is why I'm not the parent ...

The kids are are loaded up in the car, ready to be dropped off at various overnight parties so that their mom and I can go out to get loaded.

I'm playing iPod DJ, and put on "Mr. Brightside."

"I love The Killers," the 9-year old Miss Margaret shouts, and we all start singing along. She knows all the words.

Now they're going to bed
And my stomach is sick
And it's all in my head
But she's touching his-chest
Now, he takes off her dress

"Why does he want her dress?" Miss Margaret asks.

What do you tell a 4th grader? That our neurotically jealous narrator's ex-girlfreind is to do the nasty?

That she's dating a cross-dresser?

Sister (having been through mommy training) had the quick, if not perhaps too simple response ... "Well, 'cause it's pretty, honey."

That seemed to be all the answer that needed.